Because there's no such thing as too much cheese. Unrolling the braciole of consciousness; shaping the meatball of life. Because everything is funny; you just need to view it from the proper angle. Good for cats. Made in Poland. Because everything is like a hat. You know how those gorillas can be... Very unforgiving.

Thursday, June 24, 2004

Howdy!
Two nights ago, me and my girlfriends went out. We played a little water volleyball with some buddies, chatted, exchanged bathing suits for the hell of it, and then went to a lame local Ale House for nachos and greasy potato skins. While we were there we were approached by many odd characters. One being a girl who wore her fluorescent green thong on her back rather than her coolie.(Painful, yet unique). Another was an inebriated man with a scantily black mustache, hunting hat, and 'chuckaboots'(as my mom would say). He came to our table and blabbered some kind of spitty vernacular; we were able to understand him say that if he can just talk to us for one minute his buddies would buy him a bucket of beer...and we could share it with him. (gag me)
I was content on letting him talk to us for the remaining 20 seconds so he could feel confident and walk away with not just a frothy mug, but a bucket of 'brew', but my friends weren't, they ripped the poor jerk a new rump roast and he sadly left sans Le Bucket.
About a half hour later we notice that a lot of people are staring at us...okay whatever, this place is creepy. Unbeknownst to us, due to the repercussions of my friends' sharp tongues, Chuckaboots told the entire bar that we were a table of Irish nuns from a convent.
Even when we went to our cars a guy said "whoa, you girls are Irish?"
(Some were shocked that they were seen as plain as nuns, I on the otherhand was appalled over the Irish mishap. Drunken buffoons.)
Horrible! John, Vito, Gene, get me outta this place.