Yikes! Some of those photos go way down amnesia lane. As frightening as it was to see myself "way back when," it was overshadowed by the relentless march of time. Sure, I'd like to catch up on bills, trade in my 13-yeaar old car for something safer and take a couple of weeks' vacation "back East." Closer inspection revelas slow progress on those fronts. Worse yet, I publicly admit that I've never seen an automated toilet seat. Life rarely feels this futile!

Does the autoamated toilet seat come with "Magic Fingers," or is that just the bed?

Whatever you do, please don't say the stinky cab-ride had "Magic Fingers." That's too much to contmplate.