It was just a matter of time. Not a question of if, but when.

A little earlier I was cleaning some of the stuff we've been using in the kitchen. I pulled out the spray hose thing from the sink faucet to squirt some water on some things I was washing. I depressed the little lever, the main faucet cut off and the spritz action began.

So far so good.

Then I released the little lever. It kept spritzing. I tried to pull backward on the little lever. No change. I slapped it. banged it on the side of the sink. Still spritzing. Turned the water off and on. Spritz.

I turned off the water. Unwilling to be defeated (as in, "unwilling to be mildly defeated") I extended the hose and unscrewed the cap to the little shower head. It came off easily along with the little lever from the back. As I caught the two loose pieces in each palm a third component announced itself -- a white cylindrical piece of plastic that forms the inside of the nozzle. It slipped out smartly and rolled directly down the throat of, hey what's this, the garbage disposal.

I never had a garbage disposal before (wasn't even aware I had one now). Therefore I never had anything useful/valuable fall into one. Yet somehow, I knew better than to shove my hand in after it. So I got out the spaghetti-tongs and after a few minutes of playing "Operation" (as in, "removing my own funny bone") I retrieved the wayward hardware.

But the faucet is still stuck in spritzer mode. With the lever removed I can see all too well the little rounded button the activates the spray head. Maybe if I get some needle-nose pliers I can back it out -- if I can get a grip on the damned thing.

It didn't take long, but there I stood, like Uncle Vinny at the ladder-head tangled in half-lit Christmas lights, quietly muttering to myself: sonofabeetch.