This morning's news brought yet another example of why Ohio people just can't keep up. The radio show brought on a woman who's complaining how very upset she is (still is!) over a gift she got from her boss for Christmas.

Brunswick -- A cold bottle of "Big Ass Chard" wine has landed Ward 4 Brunswick Councilman Anthony Capretta in a torrent of political hot water.

At-large Councilwoman Susan Hambley [...] received the bottle of brand-name chardonnay wine during a Dec. 17 council meeting.

I got a few things to say about this. First, Big Ass has great wines -- I had my first taste of Big Ass Cab when a bunch of us from the office went to a nearby wine bar and got ourselves a few bottles to celebrate a staff-member's birthday.

The stuff is great -- very full-bodied, good taste, a big wine. In the years since, I've bought more than a few bottles of the stuff. Guido drinks it right out of the bottle.

Next, I haven't been able to find Big Ass Cab or any other kind of Ass in the Cleveland area -- and I've had the local wine store owner inquire with her suppliers. So I'd love to know where this so-called Councilman got his stash. I want in.

Most significantly, the distraught woman who received the elusive wine came on the radio this morning and tried to describe the gift that so horrified her. She could barely bring herself to utter the first two words, and described the "Chard" as a type of vegetable. Proving once more that Kucinich-voters not only don't drink Chardonnay, they don't want to know Chardonnay (or anything else about modern civilization).

Anyway, I think the people who need sensitivity training in this scenario are the racketeering politicians in Columbus who colluded with distributors to restrict Ohio residents from ordering wine direct by mail. Because if it was up to me, everyone would have a few bottles of Big Ass Cab, Big Ass Chard, and Big Zin on hand at all times.

Maybe a few sips of the good stuff will snap Ohio out of its stupor. Fat chance.

WTAM has the story covered.