A Time Piece of a Timepiece

Not sure what made me decide to do this, but late this morning I brought my nearly-30-year-old cheap-ass wristwatch back to life -- loaded a new battery, set the time and date, and... turned back the clock.

Yep, I remember getting that watch, down on Broadway, trolling the shops in my then-current state of perpetual broke-ness, looking for a bargain. And there it was: black denim overalls. Just $15. And all purchases that day came with a free wristwatch.

My recollection is a little foggy (heh) but I'm pretty sure that was late summer 1985. I had just quit job number seven of the summer (but was keeping one of the ice cream vendor gigs -- would later sell gelato at a Squeeze concert on the pier, then roasted corn at San Gennaro). School was about to start, and with it would be other jobs: I'd later get a job at the campus publishing office, then late in the year make $200 doing a drug study.

Yeah, it was madness but that's why I always looked for a deal and this was a deal. I got lots of miles out of those overalls; in those days of lax-laundry and commando tactics I think it's fair to say that was one horribly abused piece of clothing -- but it always came back for more.

And the watch -- what a cheap piece of crap. I loved it. Wore it for years. I think at one point the electronic innards got roasted, so I transplanted a working LCD timepiece into it. Super-glued the case. Replaced the strap. The watch was a champ -- it outlived Canal Jean itself (not sure when that store closed -- I think it moved to Brooklyn for a few years before going fully defunct).

Anyway, it's all ancient history. Wristwatches, that is.

All The Who's Down In Whoville

Took down the last of the Christmas lights today -- always a somber duty. But at least we got to do it over the course of an unexpectedly long weekend, given the snows of Thursday night into Friday. So I got to sit back and slurp the last of the eggnog, sip what was left at the bottom of that Frangelico bottle, and eat the final holiday chocolates. Back in the old Brooklyn days, there would still be that box of strouffoli on the counter -- that sticky pyramid, half-eaten, half-wanted, but finally eaten away as the cookie plate ran empty and the moth of January got fully into gear.

Anyway, we took down the tree and living room decorations yesterday. Now the place is boring again. And the weather is getting cold -- we'll be spending some time in the single digits in the next few days. Blowjhinksi.

You know what I need? A nice refreshing cucumber soda.

Ringing Out 2013

Is this healthy? Almost certainly not. But somehow it has become a holiday week tradition here at the Mastandrea North: the New Year Deep Fry.

I much prefer doing this outdoors but for some reason I couldn't get any of my outdoor burners to blast hot enough to defeat the low-20s temps. So after hustling in and out the backdoor over the course of about a half an hour, Cookie and I trundled all the food and gear back into kitchen to do the actual cooking.

I gotta inspect my equipment.

This morning we have another layer of snow outside. Tis the season, I suppose. But it has been a good week off. All that household repair I've been meaning to do? The door-jambs upstairs needing paint? The carpet needing removal? Yeah, I never got near any of it.

Instead, we've been watching lots of bad cinema -- scraping the bottom of the Netflix barrel in anticipation of dropping the now-exhausted service.

Zonbiasu, anyone?

Living, Loving, and Working in a Scaffold Infested Opportunist's Safe Haven

Greetings, my fellow family of bloggers and a Happy Halloween!
Miss you dearly and wish for you all many blessings.

Today I wanted to talk about the last six months of my life. 

At this moment, I consider myself a 26 year old newlywed who is an optimistic non-conformist with creative goals, tasks, and continuous life challenges. Please don't take this as a preaching, teaching, or philosophical tool, but just merely a recollection of my own meandering experiences. One thing is for sure: living, loving, and working in New York had taught me a wealth of lessons that I will take with me on this journey of life. 

Lessons in LIVING

1. New York is a jungle. This is the true in every sense of the word. Whatever or whomever comes to your mind then associating the word "jungle" in your brain is exactly what I mean ... and then some. 

2. It really does take a village to raise a child. Or in my case, a 26 year old. 

3. If you think you need extra time to do something, you probably do. 

4. Travel by yourself sometimes to help give your natural senses an awakening. 

5. Enjoy the culture of this compact world so that it can inspire you. 

6. Never compromise who you are for anyone or anything. 

7. When in doubt, keep your mouth shut. 

8. Live within your means. 

9. Your health and well being should be something you strive to constantly keep solid. 

Lessons in LOVING 

1. Self love comes first. As selfish as that sounds. It's true. 

2. Make self love first on your list. If it becomes second, make the switch as quick as possible. 

3. You are strong. Stronger than you will ever know. But make sure you understand that strength is mysterious, and that it can be misunderstood. 

4. Nip big things in the bud. Let the small stuff go. 

5. It gets better. 

6. Call family, friends, and loved ones as often as possible just to say "Hi!" 

7. Tell your spouse how much you appreciate them. Sometimes appreciation is all that is needed to get through the day. 

8. Keep on building and cultivating. It makes love so much more meaningful. 

Lessons in WORKING

1. Only you know your true potential, creative ideas, work ethic, and worth. Work doesn't. They never do. Nor will they ever. 

2. Small goals count. 

3. We are supposed to be challenged. If this was easy, then this job would be boring, unsatisfying and create zero opportunities to be resourceful. 

4. In college, I took a few management courses and what I distinctly remember being said is that managers' 4 main focuses in their job description are: to lead, control, plan, and organize. Be careful and very aware when that is not happening. 

5. Never forget that things you've been trained to do ... even if its from way back when. And if you need some memory refresher, there's always a YouTube tutorial for it.

6. Don't let your co-workers define you with a nickname or a small piece of who you they think you are. They should know you by your name, work position, your projects, and vague aspects of your work life, that's about it. 

7. If you find yourself miserable or dreading work everyday, this job is not for you. Admit it. 

So that concludes my blog about me. Is there any lessons that you've learned up to this point in your life? Thank you for taking the time to read this. 

Ravioli and Meatballs, 

Kitty Von Schitz 

That's "Mister" Dumbass to You

Yes, Mojo is familiar with a root beer commercial that aired on television years before he was born. Don't ask...

It's certainly not rare that a Mastandrea sits in a room full of people and is the only one who notices something funny.

Dumas

Recently in our social studies class we watched a video. In the video we saw Greece and there was a dr , Dr. Dumas to be exact. Immediately when I saw this I thought of the root beer commercial. I t was terrible because everyone is there bored and I am laughing.

1 Week Left

I only have one week of school left. This is very exciting. I cannot wait for it to be over. Then I can do whatever I want during the summer. I can't wait for it to be over.

Answer Key

Oh, and about that Mother's Day video... You'd have to read through the vast archives of the Macaroni Dish to understand many of the references. Here are some links to make your research more efficient:

Jumping the Curb.
This comes from one of our favorite road adventures, oft retold, when Alane lapsed into some sort of  Dukes of Hazzard fugue will driving us into a parking lot for baseball practice. I believe we went airborne. Keep it on the road lady!

I'm a Fun Guy.
Alane's favorite joke. A mushroom walks into a bar and the bartender says, "We don't serve your kind here." The mushroom replies, " Why, ain't I a fun guy?" Also oft retold. Too oft, perhaps.

I should have been a pair of ragged claws...
... scuttling across the floors of silent seas. A snip from a T.S. Elliot poem. I'm not sure myself why Cookie can recite it. The important part is Alane can too. "Let us go then, you and I..."

It's All Red Lights In this Town.
Something I started muttering to myself once I realized that the International Traffic Gestapo had synchronized all the world's traffic signals to turn red upon my approach

Draw bridge? I can't draw!
This is one of those mental tics. Not unlike what happens upon seeing a Fish Eye wine label. Reflexes. Brain damage. Piss water.

Dinosaur, dinosaur, stop tromping all around...
...the silver moon is rising, it's time to settle down. A snip from Dinosaur's Binkit, a book Alane read to the boys repeatedly when they were babies. "Time to brush your dino-teeth, and put your PJs on!" It is etched in the boys' subconscious. And ours.

Burying James Madison

So the IRS has gone full-Nixon, targeting certain individuals who sought to "peaceably assemble" (as some dead white males once called it). To paraphrase the real-world of movies: never go full-Nixon.

Hell, even Nixon never went full-Nixon: he famously talked about sending the IRS out on a political witch hunt but he never actually did it!

Particularly angering is watching the people who run these government agencies pretend it's someone else's fault. At the very top of today's power structure are people who have shamelessly waged class war, culture war, and endless political campaign. The letter and spirit of their program is that we are absolutely not equal before the law:

• In the GM bankruptcy contracts were abrogated, subsidies allocated according to political criteria.
• As health care markets were further rigged, waivers were granted for favored interests.
• With private enterprise strangled in red tape politically connected firms got regulatory relief while others got enforcement actions.
• In the effort to perpetuate racial division (and the lucrative industries that arise from it) the DOJ dropped cases that were on the verge of yielding justice -- specifically to frustrate that unwanted result
• And who ever heard of a guy named VanderSloot anyway?

The detail of each injustice has been ignored but the tone has been unmistakably set. Thus the IRS abuse is no real surprise. Those who speak for government and media have explained in many ways that liberties are to be rationed, with party-members-in-good-standing going to the head of the line. People got elected on that. It is their program. They are directly responsible for every manifestation of that project. They'll say otherwise, even as they urge on further lawlessness.

That's what got me so depressed about last fall's election: the breakdown of law had been "ratified." I think the Founders would be depressed too. If you could dig up James Madison and show him today's IRS scandal he would almost certainly say:

"You asshats let the federal government usurp all those powers and didn't expect massive corruption? We did all that work modeling a true separation of powers and you morons let it unravel! Put me back in the ground."

Don't worry, President Madison, you will stay in the ground. Apparatchiks from every corner of the permanent bureaucracy will do whatever it takes to keep you buried.

We Now Consider Mother's Day

Not all people would consider this a "tribute" but around here it's as good as it gets.